With the back drop of hurricane Irene, the sound track by Above & Beyond, and the haze of whiskey, I find myself not being about to side step this notion of how anyone not blood related can find me so easily expendable. Really trying to understand how people can walk away with such ease and carelessness, it is really starting to become quite common place. Now usually the mind set is when something continues to occur, search for the one constant between instances. Well I am that constant. Now that damn logical thinking has helped and hurt me, and in this case I am not sure if it is doing either, because there has to be some damn reason as to what it is about that constant that is causing these repeated occurrences. I am grateful for Arthur right now, as he is keeping me moving forward, barely. Days when there is something planned or obligated, life is not so bad. Wondering if a plane ride to Alabama might help right now. If there was only a way to stream the mental mess into a blog post, then just edit it from there instead of trying to slow down the flow because it is way faster then even I can type.
Been talking to myself forever, how I wish I knew me better…..